My worst moments

Pain is not welcome in my world. I push it away, even as I know I should not, ignore it and pretend it's not there to the point when it's not anymore.

I go through every day with a smile on my face, and a straight back. Every time pain get's close, I put a smile on my face, straighten up and go on.

I don't let it in. I refuse to let any weekness show. I can get pissed of to far limits, and not show it. I can get hurt beyond repair, and not show it.

I am as emotionless as any rock when it comes to the bad side. I have a heart stronger than any diamond.

On the other side however, that is where I lie. Always relaxing, smiling, having a good time. That's where I belong.

My eyes gets blurry, I feel like my ribbs break every time I cough (and I cough a lot), my throat is ripped and I can barely walk straight.

And here I'm lieing in my bed, on my computer, math book beside me and loud music in my ears. And having an awesome time.

The smile plastered on my face, I'm going to school tomorrow to ace an exam in math, with a straight back and constant coughing. That might be interesting.

Life is no better than what you make it. So I make it a joy, even in my worst moments.


  "Alice"